Ask Doc Part XI
29 11 2009How do you get through the teenaged years without strangling them? Was the change in their attitude gradual or did it just seem to come out of them all at once. I have a 13 yr old unschooled daughter and her attitude just seemed to change overnight.
The first thing I did was act shocked, and then I tried to remember being 11, 13, 15….
One of Doc’s dirty secrets is that for periods of time, two of my children (who shall remain nameless) were sent away to live with another parents, a father in one case, the other mother in another. One of my boys went to boarding school for awhile. That’s how I got through puberty without strangling one of them.
Stay consistent. Be fair. Practice grace. Stand firm. Don’t take their crap, but try to understand all the turmoil they feel inside. Keep them busy.
My girls, overnight, went from sweet willing children to screeching banshees who cried about everything. And I had more than one of them doing it at the same time. Ugh. The boys went from willing little workers to slovenly lazy eating machines who forgot everything I said three seconds after I said it and wanted to sleep 20 hours a day.
The changes were not gradual. They were angels one day, and demons the next.
Sometimes I screamed at them. Usually I used guilt.
It’s a wonder someone didn’t strangle me.
I graduated my 16 year old early and am encouraging him to go AWAY to college after this year at community college. That way, he may just live…
You sound like it helped you to remember what it was like to be their age. My parents had no idea why I was acting like I did. My friends asked me if I was on drugs (probably I was one of the few at my school who never took drugs), but it was all hormones and fear. I was glad my daughter made it through those years without killing us or us her.
Im done with all the screaming banshee bits from the girls and coped really well. I am stumped with the 12 year old boy though! Hes killing me! Cranky little bugger! As I have never been a 12 year old boy Im finding it hard to understand his sudden bursts of anger, suddenly crying like a 2 year old then acting all sassy in the space of 5 minutes. Oh hang on, that does sound a bit like PMSing doesn’t it? LOL Patience….Patience I guess the girls were a bit like that, but not as physical.